Sharing is Therapeutic. It is often advised to share your feelings or talk to someone close to you when you are feeling low. This is because sharing lightens the heart; and when you are light you can think clearly. Sharing wards off mental fog. It helps you notice the silver lining in the dark cloud that you were unable to see before.
No wonder sharing is an integral part of the recovery process in Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. Yet, sharing is not mandatory in a meeting. At the same time, you must share.
The thing is: share when you are comfortable.
When to share in a meeting?
Say, you are a first-timer. You might feel awkward or shy in your first meeting. You are in a place full of strangers. You may not want to share. You can stay silent for the first meeting. Nobody will coax you to share or say anything. You can silently watch how the meeting goes and listen to others. Do this until you feel comfortable. It could be for a couple of meetings or more.
Once you are comfortable, you can start sharing. You can share about how you started drinking, the day you had your first drink. And then how it became a habit. Or you can share your struggle with sobriety, how you tried to stop drinking, but couldn’t. You can also talk about people whom you hurt during your active addiction days.
What to share in an AA meeting?
Share only those things that you want to share. You need not give any details of each incident of your drinking days. Suppose you were arrested under DUI (Driving Under Influence) charges last year. You need not share this if you feel uncomfortable.
The objective of sharing in AA meetings is to let those bottled-up emotions out and heal emotionally. This healing plays a significant role in recovery. When you are light at heart and better able to express you will find your physical health improve too. At the same time, it makes you crave less for a “crutch,” which, in your case, is alcohol.
According to therapists, most alcoholics use alcohol as a “crutch” to handle their emotions. Most of them have underlying emotional issues – hurt, guilt, remorse, sadness, low self-esteem, grudge, dissatisfaction about life overall, and so on. These are strong triggers that make them drink. Alcohol makes them feel happy, courageous, and strong, which, in reality, they lack.
It’s not that they don’t have happiness, courage, strength, and other such qualities. God bestows everyone with these qualities. It’s just that, in the journey of life, some people either forget they have these qualities or lose them along the way. They mistakenly perceive that alcohol (or drugs) can give them these qualities.
Benefits of sharing in meetings
1. Reduces your stress:
Of course, you are stressed; a calm and composed man or woman hardly abuse alcohol! Something, somewhere, went wrong, right? It is good to express. Just open up your heart and speak. There are many things we don’t share with our friends and family. But here in local AA meetings, you can safely speak because all meetings of AA abide by the rule of confidentiality. Whatever is said or done inside a meeting stays there.
2. Lifts off your mental burden and ushers in clarity:
Is something pestering you? Speak it aloud in a meeting. Having a bad day? Share it in the meeting. Feeling low and wanting to drink? Again, you can share this in the meeting. You may get motivation and support, which can make you feel better and strengthen your sobriety resolve.
Sometimes, all that a person needs is somebody to listen to.
In an AA meeting in Arkansas, everybody is there to listen to you!
3. You gain new insights:
Sharing your problems or the situation you are in helps you release your emotional burden. At the same time, people who listen to you may give solutions or suggestions to your problems. What’s more? You may realize it isn’t a problem at all! Your perception may change (you become more inclined towards the positive), or you may gain a deeper insight into what to do in your situation. You may get newer ideas on dealing with your alcoholism.
4. You feel more connected with meetings.
You can try this yourself:
In a few meetings, sit silently. Do not participate. Just watch others and listen to them. Then, go home.
In the next few meetings, share. Participate with all your heart.
Now feel the difference.
When you share your own story, you feel more connected with others. You will begin to like spending that one hour of the meeting. It heals you. You may not “see” the healing immediately, but deep down, healing has begun.
5. Decreases chances of relapse
The more you participate in meetings, the lesser your chances of relapse. Due to the above-mentioned benefits, you already start feeling better without alcohol. The time comes (which will be soon) when you, no longer, want alcohol. In this regard, you may also want to use the tool Sobriety Calculator.
Friendships in meetings?
Yes. When you share, you connect with people. As you attend meetings regularly, you develop a bond. This paves the way for new friendships. Your new friends are different from those “drinking buddies.” They encourage you to stay sober.
On the other hand, if you prefer to stay silent in every meeting, it would be hard for you to break the ice and make friends. Also, people may perceive you as unapproachable and hesitate to strike up a conversation with you. This can be a barrier to fast recovery.
A typical meeting in Arkansas can help you find the best “sober buddies” that give your life a new direction. Don’t block this new path. Let newer people enter your life. For this, open up your heart and mind.
So, if you haven’t been sharing in a meeting, start sharing now. You will start feeling better.
For more information on finding a meeting near you, visit www.aa-meetings.com.
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